As the premiere morals tutor to America's Wealthiest Families, you might think business would be brisk. So much corruption in high places, as we all agree, but few, it seems place that corruption in their own hearts. I am not the best of men, but at least I know what I am - a high class prostitute providing a value added service equivalent to the sale, say, of mortgage backed securities. In any case, in reviewing my accounts receivable I notice that my few clients are slow paying and no paying. I provide services in advance and they pay based on results. So, I guess I have only myself to blame. Their stiffing me proves that they learned nothing and I deserve nothing. All I can say is that the Judge who sentenced me to 12 months community service as a morals tutor to Wall Street was a sadist. I would have done better in Rikers. What was I sentenced for? Planting the seeds of an apple I had bought. Seemed I owned the apple, but not the seeds. They belonged to Monsanto. I once, a long time ago, through no fault of my own, had a nocturnal emission. I hope Monsanto doesn't come after me for that. Maybe the statute of limitations has run.
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