10 Proven Ideas for Giving Back to Wealth Bondage

Wealth Bondage has been good to me. How can I give back? Here are 10 ideas:

1. Start a soda company and sell soft drinks in the third world for people, planet, and profit.
2. Promote Prada and have them give $1 to save the ostrich from which each bag was made.
3. Work with your local church to install Wealth Bondage Best Practices. Serve on the Board.
4. Hire a ghostwriter to create your Moral Biography. Co-brand with Hyatt. Place in the bedside table of every traveler, along with the Bible.
5. Have as many children as possible to give Darwinian selection the best shot at working.
6. Become a sperm or ovum donor. Make your DNA available to disadvantaged populations.
7. Create a Family Dynasty that will last one thousand years. Film yourself expressing your intentions. Require that the film be shown to your trustees daily to guide the allocation of your Pharaoic Treasures. 
8. Create a Think Tank devoted to the study of your Moral Biography to adapt the lessons learned for succeeding generations. Establish as a Church. Create costumes and props. Mitre, crooked stick, holographic image of yourself rising from the dead, etc.
9. Found and fund a school for servants. Let the school be named for the Advisor who best embodies your ideal Serving Professional. I have with me a plan for such a school. And with your permission would like to submit my own resume. A large statue of me might be too much. A heroic bust in the dress of some Greek Philosopher might be in order. Democritus, perhaps, for I am a man of the people. Seriously. 
10. Know yourself. And I do not mean carnal knowledge. Or not just that.

 

Comments

[Tom Matrullo]

Along with a school for servants, perhaps a Foundation for the Confounding of the Unserviceable Notion of the Foundaton?

Inspired in part by thoughts in a post by Shannon Mattern on the idc list:

Libraries are institutional embodiments of the prevailing – and at times competing – knowledge systems of their times and places. . ..

What if, instead, we were to privilege the integration of thinking and making, bricolage, embodied and social knowledge, etc.: what kind of an institution would represent that epistemology? Probably a library that incorporates public gathering spaces (which most public libraries do) and flexible spaces that accommodate access to and production of media in multiple formats.

Others have proposed that the library could and should be an institution that draws attention to the *politics* of knowledge, that encourages patrons to question the interests of those creating and distributing information – and those providing the infrastructure for its creation and distribution.

[Phil Cubeta]

If you or Shannon have $10 million you could start a modest foundation, providing 5% of that per year in grants to libraries. You could grant $50,000 a year to 10 libraries. That would be a small start on this important work. Now as to the $10 million? Perhaps Shannon is a hedge fund manager? At least we have the example of Carnegie himself whose steel fortune founded so many local libraries.

[Tom Matrullo]

I don't personally know Shannon, but I can ask her about the $10 mill. I've got $10 to seed. I'm thinking a ConFoundation would benefit from, you know, the hard work of, uh, Cons. Do you think we could tap Madoff, or his wife? Or maybe Bulger or Rick Scott?

[Phil Cubeta]

Conrad Black might have an interest in a media foundation. Perhaps a Foundation could be negotiated in lieu of bail.

[Phil Cubeta]

Some in prison make license plates; maybe Conrad Black could make grants.

[Chewed Gum Of The Gods]

Repackaging the Chewed Gum Of The Gods as something novel and flavorless to suck on - to this I would devote considerable energy for naught but symbolic return.

Spit some my way as you pass, Chief, I will do you proud.

[Tom Matrullo]

Certain places - England, e.g. - they name their homes, indulge their animals and get daft in the gardens. Here in USia, we are too boring to name our homes, we're enslaved to our pets and can get quite serious about our gardens. Our insanities pass into the superrich and their hobby-horses, where they are protected from common sense by lawyers, the Wall St. Journal, and Forbes.

[Phil Cubeta]

Hobbyhorses - J. Swift had good rides on those. Veblen also comes to mind. And Petronius.

[Phil Cubeta]

I thought we were the chewing gum of the gods.

[Tom Matrullo]

And of course Mr. Sterne.

[Phil Cubeta]

You are precisely correct, Prof. Matrullo. Thank you for the cordial scholarly intervention. That strategic philanthropy might be Shandyesque is inconceivable. Hum.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lillibullero

[Al Veoli]

The best you can expect is to escape from God's mouth as the debris of a popped bubble floating to the earth in pieces. Once grounded you may collect yourself, as like attracts like, and peddle your gooey "integrity" like a trouper.

[Phil Cubeta]

Spat from God's mouth, Al, were the lukewarm, those neither for nor against. That is Biblical.

[Morrie Sinko]

Who better to create His Hell on Earth?

[Phil Cubeta]

Walter Wink's work might change your mind.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walter_Wink.

Hell on Earth is Roman Rule.

Heaven is the Kingdom within.

Eternal Life is a moment, one heartbeat, the kairos where time and eternity meet, always available.

The Resurrection is a spiritual revolution, leading to a change in the social order.

The Holy Roman Empire was not holy, Roman, or an Empire.

The Reformation is within, each of us reforming ourselves. That is in our power.

[Morrie Sinko]

Are you quoting from memory again? You are like a phalanx of Greek police pounding my sorry lukewarm ass to the pavement. If I were divine, something orderly, oppressive and anti-feminine could be formed from my remains. As it stands, I'll probably just clog the sewer system. Oy.