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September 05, 2010

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copedendent

A manager called a meeting and broke down in front of her employees. My girlfriend left me, she said, and began to weep. The employees were sympathetic and allowed her to vent her grief. She then admitted that management had over-engineered their human service employees. This had become known inside and outside the corporation and was quite distressing.

The strategy had been do more in less time for less money to infinity. Standard corporate practice, she said. Lately, however, soft outcomes (successful human service interactions) had begun declining. All our employees cannot be incompetent, recalcitrant or slacking, we thought. It must be something else. But what?

So she had come to her team for ideas.

Stop killing us, you monsters, they thought in unison, then some began to speak.

Small pitiful noises. Horrible ultrasonic shrieks. All constructive suggestions when viewed from the planet Mongo.

The manager nodded. She was grateful and it was good. The meeting ended.

Later

We had another meeting while I was gone? Yeah. What was the upshot? We are your parents, we have a problem, and we will continue to drink. That's it? In a nutshell, donkeygirl. Oh. And pull harder. Yeah. Pick it up.

Afterword

Somewhere a vessel was sinking. It did not know what it had struck. There was no one left in steerage. And the band played on. And the band played on.

phil

It is all normal, all good, and all according to plan. Just watch your step. We did have a meeting when you were out. You will be attending the session with HRD at 1 pm. I can't tell you anything more.

A careless reader

Communication is the last refuge of the artless.

Phil Cubeta

Authenticity, as my Boss told me, is "touching, deeply touching."

a careless reader

It's not unusual for a Boss to idealize each of his weaknesses into a strength that he deludes himself he possesses, like the firebug who wants to be a fireman, the petty thief who fantasizes himself a cop, the dickhead who moralizes about respect, or the untouchable calling touché.

phil

The Boss then appreciates the underling who mirrors back the Boss's narcissistic delusions. We in sales call this being a Trusted Advisor, or Serving Professional.

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