Says here in the paper:
A new gated community slated for Dallas in what had been the Arboretum. The Common Weal will offer vacation homes starting at $1.5 million. The developer, who recently sold a transnational chain of Entertainment Facilities, and is best known for her philanthropy, has pledged one percent of profit to serve soup on Sundays in Central Dallas. One in every 100 homes will be donated to the Humane Society, so stray dogs can have a real home in which to raise their puppies. A troupe of Gypsy Scholars will perform weekly in various masks to entertain the residents and add a touch of High Culture.
Capitalism is not that bad, really. Nice people doing good things. I don't know why some people are always complaining. A few trees more or less is not going to make the world a better or worse place. Think of the homeless. They need that soup. Many stray dogs will be helped. Puppies deserve our love. Rather than looking for so-called root causes, maybe we should all give a little credit where credit is due.
I knew you were a great satirist, Phil, but I never suspected you of such a brilliant flight of fancy. Housing for dogs? 1% for soup? Careful, I think you're verging on the out-and-out parodic.
Posted by: Nonprofiteer | July 04, 2007 at 07:15 PM
Thank you, Nonprofiteer. "Embrace and extend" the best elements of social venture philanthropy and what do you have? Virtue with Profit.
Posted by: Phil | July 04, 2007 at 07:33 PM
Soup? That's really thinking outside the bogs, there Philip.
Why not force feed the hungry until they explode? Paint them gold like that naked broad in the bond film? Disembowel them and weave room dividers from their entrails? Spray them with that "new car smell" everyone jerks over.
C'mon, caring community, let's kick this thing into overdrive! The poor are ready, why aren't you??
Enough with this effete malingering.
Posted by: bUM fREE | July 05, 2007 at 09:08 AM
The poor are ready, indeed. All the fight is long gone. The poor don't much vote, don't organize, can't buy much, don't lobby, and don't resist. They have gotten what they deserve. Prisons are the answer to social injustice. For social unrest we have the repeal of habeas corpus, detention centers, emergency decrees, martial law, and that new microwave heat ray mounted on Humvees to teach obedience to authority. A one in 20 million shot at the lottery is the best investment a poor person can make, and hope comes cheap at the price. In a flat world, the slums of America will rival Calcutta. That is life, it is all financial hydraulics. The main thing is that the people at the top be philanthropic so the stray dogs don't suffer.
Posted by: Phil | July 05, 2007 at 06:31 PM
Forgive me, Masters, I forget myself yet again. No need for profitless rancor.
• The Investress shall sustain / those things worth sustaining.
That is the bottom line upon which I must focus. (And she sports quite a fetching one, too.)
Posted by: bUM fREE | July 05, 2007 at 10:25 PM
(p.s. I take full responsibility, as befits an honorable man, but... my dog tells me that the notorious Candidian, Commoner, has been whispering into my sleep. Can't a fellow cop a Z or three without some socialist putting him at risk?)
Posted by: bUM fREE | July 05, 2007 at 10:27 PM
She who has invested in our polity deserves a return on that investment, surely.
Posted by: Phil | July 05, 2007 at 10:53 PM
Independence Day - some people call that "Retirement." Or manumission.
Posted by: Phil | July 06, 2007 at 08:35 AM