Node 57 Under.WealthBondage.com

I appreciate the link from my friend and nemesis, The Happy Tutor, but I do wish he kept better company. Being seen in a Wealth Bondage Bordello with Peter Karoff, Albert Ruesga, and Tracy Gary making nice to the low-rent customers around back by the Dumpster is not going to do much for my professional reputation as Trusted Moral Advisor to America's Wealthiest Families. I am trying to promote rich-family values here, people. Bow your head like in Church. We are in the presence of great sums of money. And where you find money in large quantities you will find sanctimony, and hyprocisy, as well as vigilance and retribution, more so than a sense of humor. So do not giggle, or the laugh will ripple throughout the congregation calling into question the very greed on which our society depends for its essential functions. Read Adam Smith: giving is ok, but what would happen if everyone did it? The world as we know it would fall apart. We would have democracy, liberty, joy and spirituality running rampant. Best to leave such forces of extreme freedom deep under.wealthbondage.com where they belong, as if in the catacombs, under Rome.

Personally, I am not looking to get crucified either. The rich are ok with me. Their values are noble. I love them all, regardless, as long as they tip me well as the Moral Advisor to them and their kids. So, Tutor, if you don't mind, Back Off! I am trying to run a reputable business here around philanthropy and I don't need you screwing it up, just when I begin to get a little credibility as a Morals Tutor to the Stars.

Comments

[Albert Ruesga]

The Dumpster comforts me, like a meal rich in fried foods. I recently spent several hours listening to the cream of the conservative intelligentsia, many of them, as you know, driven from the universities by narrow-minded Liberal department heads. A number of them seemed obsessed with the idea that we might all one day stop producing children--as they've done in Europe--and choose instead to spend our days "pleasantly," opting out of the machine that grows our GDP year after year. Please be careful, Phil. As Morals Tutor to the Stars you need to inject a good dose of pro-procreation and product-consumption into your lessons, otherwise I fear you'll have all hell to pay.

[Phil]

Well, procreation is certainly a by-product of Wealth Bondage, so you might want to contact The Happy Tutor. We are talking, though, primarily about white people right?

[Albert Ruesga]

U bet. If black was the color, then one was the number.

[Debbie]

High time that the low rents met the high rents. I think we need a new Morals Tutor to the Stars. This current one is getting kind of complacent. Meanwhile I think I will put on some motley and prance about. If nothing else, I will provide a distraction while the REAL work is getting done down below.

These days, I am as foolish as a fool can get. Takes a fool to appreciate another fool, though, and maybe that's what Norman Vaughan was, except that he wore a parka and woolly mitten and probably thermal underwear, but it was he who said, "Dream big and dare to fail." And that is what currently drives me. Well, why not? As Gerry said to me just a moment or two ago, might as well fail spectacularly. Me, I've never met success, so failure will simply have to suffice. Not so bad a way to lead a life, really. Just as long as love and joy factor into such an existence. And, if you cannot laugh at yourself, then who can you laugh at?

No one too dour in the dumpter or in the catacombs. Come on down. It's nice and cool there. Just a perfect place for me, what with all the hot flashes and all. Ahhhhhhh.

Maybe we could convince management to fill a small portion of the catacombs with mud.

Mud, mud. Glorious mud.

Nothing quite like it, for cooling the blood.

So follow me, follow. Down to the hollow.

And there let us wallow. In glorious mud.

[Phil]

Failing gracefully is a learned skill, takes practice. I am still mastering that craft, a mere apprentice. Please don't keep throwing the Happy Tutor in my face. I am successful and respected. He lives in a Dumpster. What is that telling you, Debbie?

[Debbie]

Me, too, Phil. A mere apprentice. Really good at regrouping, though. Really good at rubbing my sore behind and getting back up.

I think you could learn a lot from the Happy Tutor. I know I have. He's reminded me about things I had long forgotten. He's challenged me. Oh and he uses the rack really well. I am well stretched. Dumpster's a really comfortable place to be. Cosier than you'd imagine. You should try it some time.

[Phil]

I have no intention of throwing my career away for the good of mankind. Charity begins at home. I have my own responsibilities. You and Tutor go save the world. I will save my own skin, thank you very much.

[Debbie]

We will. Perhaps he will be to my Don Quixote. Save the world and have a sing-a-long. Yeah. My kinda Sancho Panza. HT is a bit too curmudgeonly for that, but he'll do in a pinch. But, really, how about you, Phil, as Sancho Panza? I bet you'd look just adorable in a Spanish peasant's costume. Me, I don't look a thing like Don Quixote, but, hey, I'm game. Maybe we won't ride horses, either, but, oh, I dunno. We'll figure something out. Take the train when it's possible. Be hobos and spread the Word of the Commons. Sure. And to whom better than them's what got nothin'?

[Debbie]

Oh, how, horrible. I forgot to close my tag. Egads. Sorry.

[Phil]

Sancho is more my style. You can't change the world, you know.

[Debbie]

Hmmmmm. I guess I'll have to lose a lot of weight and gain a lot of height. Don Quixote is a tall, thin guy, after all. At least according to Picasso. Maybe Tutor will put me on the rack. Stretch me even more.

Come on, Phil. Sing it with me now.

To try when your arms are too weary...

Not sure if I am willing "to march into Hell for a heavenly cause," but I do know I am willing to make a tireless effort.